Dear Diary
by DarkSecretLove
Summary: The organization gave her members diaries. Three of them, Axel, Roxas and Demyx are writing things down in them, all in their own way. Might contain some AkuRoku and ZeMyx. -DISCONTINUED!-
1. The first impression

Diary, or something like it…

Some idiot of the Organization came up with the idea of giving us diaries. In hells name, WHY DIARIES!!!! WHY ME!!!!  
I blame Demyx, he's the sensitive guy of the group.  
The worst thing is that we actually have to write stuff down as well.  
Don't ask me why, I don't know, I just found this thing with a note on it that it was for me. Wait, I'll put the note in here.

_Number VIII,  
This diary is for you.  
I insist that you use it. _

Seriously, WHY??! Why me and a diary… this can never go the right way…  
Whatever, I'm off finding Roxas to do something fun.

Ttyl.

Ps. Maybe I'll burn you up and say that it was an accident…

Dear diary,

It's me, Roxas. You don't know me yet, but you will.  
I'm Roxas, the 13th member of Organization 13.  
I just found this diary, this is going to be so much fun! =)  
Well, I guess we all got one, as there was a note on top of it saying that they insist we use it and stuff… ah whatever.  
I'll ask Axel later if he got one too.  
Well I'm Roxas, number XIII. I'm a nobody. Just like everyone else.  
It's nice to write my thoughts down here though, can't really explain why.  
Great, now I have to get a new door as Axel just kicked it in… Well I'm off to do something fun with Axel, he just stormed into my room complaining about the whole diary thing.

Baibai.

Dear diary,

This is Demyx. Number IX.  
This will be so great, I'll write down my thoughts and stuff in here.  
I'm number IX in a row of XIII.  
Number I is our leader, Xemnas. (or Mansex as Axel likes to call him. -_-)  
II is Xigbar  
III Xaldin  
IV Vexen  
V Lexeaus  
VI Zexion  
VII Saix  
VIII Axel  
IX me, Demyx  
X Luxord  
XI Marluxia  
XII Larxene  
XIII Roxas  
Roxas, Axel and me are close friends, we spend a lot of time together, mostly doing nothing and talk about useless things, but we have a lot of fun. Sometimes we can go on missions together, but that doesn't happen very often.  
Zexion is kinda scary, but he's nice as well. I think I might like that guy.  
Saix just IS scary.

I'm off to play on my sitar for a while. Maybe I'll go outside into the garden to the small river… I'll see.

Bye!


	2. A failing mission

Diary… THING.

This is Axel again.

DAMN YOU! You ruined my mood.  
The most stupid thing: Roxy and Dem actually seem to LIKE the whole diary thing…  
I should get them to Vexen to see if they're healthy and stuff…

I'm off on a mission to destroy some Heartless.  
Hope that you're gone when I return.

Axel OUT.

Ps. Maybe I'll drown you in the toilet…

Hi there, new found Diary,

I just went to Axel's room, but he wasn't there. He's kinda disappeared… I can't seem to find him anywhere. And Demyx is nowhere to be found either.

I think Axel might be gone on a mission, he was really, REALLY, pissed off about his diary. Killing some Heartless seems to get him a little calmer again when he's so angry. *chuckles* or me pressing my lips against his works as well. Nah, just kidding. But it DOES work.

Anyway, I have to get to the Superior's office to ask if he can get me a new door, I don't really like the whole door-not-being-in-place thing. Everybody just peeks in! Maybe I'll sleep in Demyx's room tonight…  
Wait, Axel will get mad at me when I do that. Ah whatever, I'm not sleeping in a room that has no door.

I'm off seeking Demyx for a little longer.

Dear diary,

I really should get you a name, just keep calling you diary is stupid. Well, I'll let you know when I get you one.

The place near the river is so peaceful! I really enjoy being there. Today I made the water dance again, just by playing my sitar. It was fun to watch.  
I heard someone scream my name, I think it was Roxas, but I'm not sure. I'll ask him later if he was shouting for me.  
Roxas probably likes the diary thing as well. I'm pretty sure Axel doesn't. He doesn't like to talk about his feelings.  
I wonder what Zexion thinks.

God I really don't like Saix, every time I see him he scares the hell out of me. He just opened my door without knocking, I really hate it when he does that.

But I'm off to the Superior's office, he probably wants me to go on a mission or something.

Maybe I'll go with Roxas, that would be fun!

Later,

Demyx.

DIARY!

I just got back from Vexen, Axel is doing bad.

He indeed WAS on a mission but it kinda went wrong. He has this HUGE wound on his back, starting on his left shoulder, going down to his right hip… it looks really scary… other than that, he has a hell of a lot small wounds…  
Damn, Lexeaus scared the hell out of me telling me that I had to get to Vexen's room, pretty QUICKLY because there was something wrong with Axel.

I just got back here, he's asleep now. Vexen took care of the wounds, but told Axel that he wasn't alowed to move a lot and that his body needs a lot of sleep to recover.  
That's just something for Axel. NOT. Damn.  
Vexen also said that there has to be someone in his room when he's asleep, to check if everything is going okay. Well, as my room still has no door I said I'll do that.  
Damn I'm worrying my ass off here… and I still have to tell Demyx about this… he'll probably freak out.

Anyway, Axel's asleep in his own bed now and I'm off to get Dem and check on Axel.

I'll write some more later.

Roxas.

Dear diary,

I still have no name for you, but I will soon enough. Maybe I'll call you Illusion. That sounds nice right?

Anyway, Roxas scared the hell out of me by running into my room and telling me that Axel got wounded badly when he was on his mission earlier today (probably after he found the diary). Together we went to Axel's room, where we found him asleep.  
His face was very pale due to the blood he had lost, it looked kinda scary…

I'm so sorry for Roxas, when we were in Axel's room he burst into tears because he was so worried about the Flurry. Poor Roxy… I tried to comfort him, but that didn't really work out. Even when I let his tears dance he couldn't effort a smile…  
I think he might be feeling more for the pyro than he thinks…  
And I can't blame him, Axe is kinda cute and they look cute together.

Well I'm off checking on Roxy and Axel for a moment and then I'm off to bed, it's getting late.

Bye.

Dear diary,

It's Roxas again.

Right now I'm sitting in a chair in Axel's room. Looking at the moon and hoping that Axe will recover soon… I'm really worried about him, the wound looked pretty nasty and he has to get a lot of rest, which is a hopeless case with Axel… would it help him if I wished on a star that he recovers soon? Probably not, but it's worth a try.

I'll write further later, there's someone knocking at the door.

Well, that was Xemnas, asking if Axel was alright. Well of course not. Damn. He's asleep though, that's good. I'll join him in sleeping soon I think, I'm getting sleepy and I'm tired…

Demyx checked on us like half an hour or so, that was really nice of him. I know he cares a lot about Axel as well and I could see the worries written on his face.

I'm off to bed now, Axel's bed.

Bai bai.


	3. Missions and randomness

Dear Illusion,

I hope that you like the name I gave you, I do like it.  
When I woke up this morning I had breakfast and then went to Axel's room to see how he was doing. He was awake, lying on his back, staring at the ceiling. Roxas was deep asleep in his arms. They looked really cute =). Axe was doing okay, some of the wounds were healing already, and his back didn't hurt too badly.  
After talking to him for a while I noticed he was getting tired, so I told him to get some more rest (and for a change he actually did).  
When I closed the door behind me he was already asleep. I went outside into the garden to think things over. I sat down at the edge of the fountain and played with the water.  
When I felt someone staring at me I looked up, straight into Zexion's eyes. Damn, his eyes are beautiful. When he noticed I was staring back at him he gave a smile and walked away. I love his smile, he hardly ever smiles unless he has a reason to. I wonder what made him smile…  
Now I've got 2 things to ask him! ^_^

I know I'm a nobody, and nobodies are heartless, and we're supposed to have no feelings and emotions and stuff… but I do have emotions and feelings, and I'm sure Axel and Roxas do as well.  
I don't think emotions and feelings come from the heart, but they're coming from your soul…

Well I'm off, Roxy came in.

Dear diary,

Despite that Vexen wanted me to stay with Axel, Xemnas had other plans, he wanted Dem and me to go on a mission. 'To get your thoughts away from Number VII.' He said.  
Like I won't worry about Axe when I'm not around. Damn, this will probably only make it worse.  
Well, Dem is ready to go by now… so I'll write on later.

Bai.

Thing.  
I'm not going to call you diary, or give you a name like Demyx did. Thing will do just fine. It's that we have to use these diaries that I write down stuff in here.

Well the mission from yesterday didn't work out the way I hoped. It got me wounded and pretty badly. There's a big wound on my left shoulder going down to my right hip. What a scar that will be.

The biggest problem is that I have to stay in bed about all day long. I hate to stay in bed that long! When Roxy is lying next to me, okay, then it's not that bad. But he's not, he's not even around, he had to go on a mission with Demyx.

Roxas stayed with me all night and eventually crawled next to me in bed. He's such a cutie ^^.

We should get out some day soon and visit Sora and Riku again, we haven't seen them in like ages and they're fun to hang around with.

My back will have to recover first though…

Axel out.

Maybe I'll tear you to pieces and feed you to the fishies.


	4. No amnesia!

Dear Illusion,

The mission was fun, Roxy and I had fun together and kinda forgot to worry about the Flurry all the time.  
Roxas didn't mind to hear me talking about Zexion half of the time I was talking, often he just laughed and said that I sounded like a hopelessly in love high school girl. That was funny.

Axel is doing a little better, although his mood is going down. Lying in bed all day long is something he really hates. When we came into his room Vexen was taking care of the big wound on Axel's back. It looks really scary. He said that when it wouldn't stop bleeding soon (it started bleeding again when he removed the bandages) he would have to stitch it. This made the pyro's mood even worse.  
Poor Roxas got really pale seeing the big wound and not much later he ended up fainting and falling on the floor.  
Well, I should get myself something for dinner, I'm starving. Maybe I'll get Roxy and Axe something as well…

Bye!

Dear diary,

The mission was not as bad as I thought, Dem and me had a lot of fun together. He couldn't stop talking about Zexion, which was funny because he was wondering about all kinds of silly things, if he likes the diary for example.

When we got back, we immediately went to Axel's room, where we found Vexen examining the wound on his back… it looked so scary… I fainted, and woke up lying next to Axel, who was awake and lovingly stroking my hair. I felt safe for some reason. When I opened my eyes I looked straight into his fierce green ones.  
We remained lying like that for a while, but when Axel tried to turn his back started to hurt really badly. I asked him to turn a little further (as he was lying on his back by now) so I could see if there was something wrong with the big wound. And there was, at some places there was blood visible through the bandages…  
I got up and got Vexen to Axel's room. There he examined the wound again and told Axe that he would have to stitch it. Axel was getting weaker by the moment due to his blood loss, and Vexen said that it would be dangerous if he would give him some anesthesia, he might never wake up again… it sounded so scary…  
Vexen went away to get the things to get the wound stitched and for the first time since we know each other I saw a little fear in Axel's eyes. He asked me if I could please, very big please stay with him. I said yes and placed a small kiss on his forehead. He smiled a little and sighed deep.  
When Vexen got back he asked Axel to lie down on his belly and stay still. I sat down at the edge of the bed, holding Axel's hand and stroking the hair out of his face.

After half an hour of hellish pain, the wound was stitched and the bleeding had stopped. Axel squeezed my hand about all the time. In the beginning that was kinda painful, but later on he was losing his strength to fight the pain… it was so sad to see… His eyes stayed close all the time. When it was finally over I saw the tears standing in Axel's eyes. I've never seen him cry… carefully I wiped them away and he gave a flaw smile. Vexen silently left and Axel gently moved over and asked me to stay with him and so I laid down next to him. He buried his face in my neck and while I was stroking his hair he fell asleep.

When he turned away from me I got up and started to write this all down… Axel's still asleep… Dem came by with food for us, I ate mine but Axel didn't, as he's still asleep. He'll eat it when he wakes up…

I'm off, Xemnas came in.

Dear Illusion,

When I went to Axel's room to give him and Roxy their dinner I found Axel asleep and Roxas lying next to him. Roxy was awake, but very tired. He told me what happened, Vexen had to stitch Axel's back, but without anesthesia… damn that must have been painful… our poor Flurry… I saw it impressed Rox very much, he was nearly crying when he told me about it… I really hope Axe will be okay soon…  
Well, it's getting late and I should get some sleep.  
I'm off to check on Roxy and Axe for one last time and then heading to bed…

G'night!


	5. Insomnia and sleeping angels

Dear Illusion,

When I went to Axel's room to give him and Roxy their dinner I found Axel asleep and Roxas lying next to him. Roxy was awake, but very tired. He told me what happened, Vexen had to stitch Axel's back, but without anesthesia… damn that must have been painful… our poor Flurry… I saw it impressed Rox very much, he was nearly crying when he told me about it… I really hope Axe will be okay soon…  
Well, it's getting late and I should get some sleep.  
I'm off to check on Roxy and Axe for one last time and then heading to bed…

G'night!

Dear diary,

Xemnas came by to ask how Axel was doing, Vexen had informed him about the stitching and he wanted to know how things were going. Axe didn't notice, he was still asleep. And he's still asleep now. Xemnas told me to tell Axel that he hoped that Axe would get better soon. He probably just said that because he wants Axel to be ready for missions again asap.  
Hmm, looks like Axy woke up, I'm off checking on him for a moment!

~3 hours later~

Axel is finally asleep again… he kept waking up all the time… he's in so much pain and it won't seem to fade, unless he's asleep… but he turns a lot when he's asleep and doing that caused pain, which woke him up every time…  
It simply hurts to see him in so much pain as he is in right now… I mean he's one of the strongest persons I know, I've never seen him cry until today and I've seen tears leaving his eyes several times the last few hours…  
I went to Vexen to get him something for the pain and now he's finally asleep and deep as well.  
I'm going to try and get in the bed as well without waking him up…

Roxas off to sleeeeeepzzzzzz.

Thing.

Well, yesterday Vexen had to stitch my back. Without anesthesia.  
I don't think I've ever been in so much pain. Roxas didn't leave my side for a moment, he kept holding my hand and trying to comfort me. It worked a little. I'm tired as hell and according to Rox and Dem I sleep a lot.  
Sleeping seems the only time I'm not in pain, but I wake up a lot because I'm in pain… this is no fun.

Roxas and Demyx are really sweet, they're with me a lot of the time and try to make me forget the pain I'm in. Roxas is around actually all day and all night long. He even sleeps in my bed! Not that I mind, he's cute when he's asleep, he cuddles with me all the time. When that happens I don't really mind the waking up all the time, it at least makes it less worse.  
He looks like a cute little angel when he's asleep.  
Even though I don't know what angels look like, I'm pretty sure Roxy is one, but he has lost his wings or something.

Well I'm found sleeping again.

Axel ou-zzzzz.

Or I'll just throw you out the window.


	6. You got him a WHAT?

Dear Illusion,

Today I had to go on a mission, without anyone else, so it was kinda boring. But I got the greatest idea ever!  
I'm going to get Axel a kitten! He'll love it (and I hope he won't burn it accidentally), I'm sure!  
I mean, he's in bed all day long and well, Roxas can't stay there forever you know… but when he gets a kitten there's always someone around when Roxas and I aren't.  
Xemnas and the others will probably hate it, but I'm sure the flurry will love it =).  
And if not, I'll keep it myself.  
And kittens are cute! They play with everything and purr so cute… I love kittens.

I'm off to find a kitten.

Bye!

Dear diary,

Demyx told me he's planning on something to brighten Axel's days a little and I'm truly wondering what in hell's name that could be. He wouldn't tell me…  
Axel's days can't seem to get worse right now, he's in pain a lot of the time and can't get out of bed so often so he has to ask for things all the time, something he really hates.

As my room still has no door (Xemnas is too lazy to get me a new one _) I'm still sleeping in Axel's room. In his bed, to be precise. I'm not having the idea that he minds it and I have to say that I don't mind either. The poor flurry is having the worst time of his life I think, not able to move a lot, nothing to do, and Dem and me can't be around him 24/7 as we have to do our missions as well…  
Other than that he's tired about all the time, he sleeps a lot, Demyx leaves then most of the time but I stay and look at his face, being free from pain and thoughts, from people hurting him… just free from everything. He looks like a read headed angel when he's asleep.

Well I'm off for a while, he just woke up and wants some water…

Baibai.

Thing,

Today Vexen came to see how the wound was healing. It was healing nicely he said and he refreshed the bandages. He said that in a few days I could try and get out of bed more, trying to actually walk and stuff.  
I don't do that really often, unless I have to go to the bathroom. It causes a lot of pain, so I don't really like getting out of the bed anyway.  
Dem and Roxas offered me their help, but I'm not sure if I want it, I mean, it's kinda embarrassing to ask for things constantly, but to have people helping you to walk again is probably even worse.

It's a shame that Riku and Sora can't come to the castle, I'd really like to see then and if they could come here, Roxas could do what he's here for more often: go out on missions. Not that I want him gone, definitely not, I really appreciate his presence.  
I wonder if Mansex got him a new door already, since I kinda killed the old one by blowing it to pieces… woops.  
I'm off to sleep a little longer, Rox and Dem aren't around and I'm getting BORED!  
And I'm tired.

Maybe I'll take you with me on a mission and hide you on Destiny Islands.

Dear Illusion,

I got Axel's kitten!  
She's so cute!! She has bright blue eyes (just like Roxy, but less shiny). She's black, with one white spot around her left eye, 3 white feet and a white stripe running from her head to her tail.  
I just showed her to Roxas, who's playing with her right now. He LOVES her! =). We'll go to  
Axel's room now and give her to him.

I wonder what he'll call her...


	7. Evil kitty and a heavy world

Dear diary,

Dem got Axel the CUTEST kitten you can think of! She's black, has 3 white feet and a white spot around one of her eyes. She also has a slanting head, which is adorable.

We went to Axel's room, where we found him asleep. We placed the kitten next to his head and she started to purr really loud and eventually she licked his cheek, waking him up and say something like 'Roxy, don't, you're driving me crazy'  
Dem and I looked at each other and burst out in laughter, causing Axe to be fully awake.  
At first he asked what was so funny, and while asking this he turned to his side, which made his hair move, which was very appealing to the kitten to attack his hair.  
And so she did.  
Axel yelped (hearing him yelp is just adorable) and almost set the poor thing on fire! Dem was on the floor of his laughing by now and I tried my best to keep standing.  
'What is this… this… THING doing in my ROOM?!' Axel shouted, causing Demyx (who just got back to his feet) to fall to the floor again.  
When the laughing was over Dem explained him that it was a kitten and a present.  
Axel rubbed his eyes and took a closer look.  
'It's actually quite cute' was his conclusion.  
He doesn't know what he'll call her yet, but he'll figure something soon I think.

I'm off, Xemnas called me to his office.

Thing.

Dem and Roxy got me a kitten.  
It's actually pretty cute.  
It almost gave me a heart attack, waking me up and pulling my hair.  
And I nearly burned her… woops.  
I haven't figured out how to call her though, can't come up with a cute name.

She's black, has 3 white feet, one spot around one of her blue eyes (just like Roxy's eyes) and a white stripe starting at her neck going down to her tail.  
Right now she's killing my shoelaces.

The thought behind the whole thing is really nice, they don't want me to feel lonely when they're not around.  
The kitten is playful as hell and she's a brave one, attacking things all the time and stealing everything she sees.

I'm off playing with her for a while and get some more sleep.

Axel out.

I'll give you to the kitten, she'll tear you apart and probably eat you or pee on you or something.

Dear Illusion,

Axel loves the kitten! I didn't really expect something else though.  
He doesn't know a name for her yet, but it will be probably something weird.  
Or just Roxas xD

I haven't seen Zexion the last few days, maybe he's off on a long mission. Marluxia is gone as well, maybe they're away together…

Xemnas noticed there was something different in the castle, that's why he asked me to come to his office. I explained the situation and the kitten is allowed to stay.

I should get Roxas away from the castle for a few hours, he's exhausted because of his worries about the flurry and doesn't sleep so very much because he's still sleeping in Axel's room and in his bed. Axe still wakes up a lot, causing Roxas to wake up as well because of his cursing.  
I'll take him out for an afternoon in Twilight Town, or so, or maybe I'll ask Riku and Sora to join us there. That always cheers him up.  
The poor blonde is feeling like the world is leaning on his shoulders…  
He won't say it with so many words, but I can see he's coming close to the point of not being able to bear this anymore.  
It's good that Axel is making progress though, Vexen told him he could try and walk again soon. Roxy and I offered the pyro our help but he doesn't want it. I think that he finds it embarrassing or something.

I'm off, Roxy came in.  
Demyx out.

Thing,  
You should be thankful, I just saved you from getting killed by a cute kitten.  
Now be nice or I'll let her kill you at last.


	8. Horrible players and fake smiles

Dear diary,

Xemnas finally fixed my door so I can sleep in my own room again =).  
He sent Demyx and me out on a mission, but Dem refused and took me out for an afternoon in Twilight Town.  
That was really nice, Riku and Sora were there as well and we had a lot of fun.  
They kept feeding me chocolate until I felt sick, trying to make me feel better.  
It worked, but it made me feel sick after a while.  
It was fun, but I knew Axel wants to see Riku and Sora pretty badly… so I felt kinda sad that he wasn't there with us.  
We bought him a lot of chocolate and some play stuff for the kitten.

When we got back Axel was asleep with the kitten asleep on his belly. How adorable ^_^

I'm off, making some dinner for Axe and me.  
And trying to figure out what a kitten eats…

Baibai

Dear Illusion,

Zexion's back! =) I kinda bumped into him in the hallway on my way out to the garden to play my sitar. He asked me where I was going and so I told him. He asked me if it was okay for him to join me and I said yes (of course I did!!).  
We sat down near the fountain and I started playing. In the beginning I was kinda nervous but he gave me an encouraging smile which made the nerves disappear (and the butterflies in my belly come alive).  
After I played for over an hour or so I noticed him looking at me all the time with a small smile on his face. That felt kinda weird, he had this strange look in his eyes… but it wasn't something bad.  
In the end he even asked me if he could try and play some!  
He's a horrible player, now THAT'S for sure. But he enjoyed the playing and even though the sound is horrible it looked cute.  
The tip of his tongue was out his mouth of concentration, so cute!  
We ended up talking about all kinds of stuff, including missions and our diaries.  
He confessed to me that he writes poems in his diary, that's SO cute! =) I just write down my thoughts and what's going on down here, he writes poems about almost anything.  
I asked him if I could read one sometime and he said yes! *happy*

Dem out to tell Axy and Roxy.

Thing,

With some help of Roxas I tried to walk today.  
It hurt.  
Like bloody hell.  
It wasn't exactly that much fun, but I tried to stay strong and take a few steps, but soon I just plopped down on a chair, with some sort of weird grin (according to Rox).  
I think I'll try again later.

Oh, and the fact that the kitten-thing was clinging to my pants/feet wasn't exactly helping, as it made Rox giggle all the time and it hurt me even more.  
Damn you, you little animal!  
I like the thing, but it can be annoying as well… but everyone's annoying once in a while right?

Demyx has left for a mission for a couple of days, and guess with who? With Zexion. I hope they'll get closer, I'm kinda getting sick of Demyx's nagging about Zexion this, Zexion that etc.

I'm off to sleep for a while,

Axel out.

Maybe I'll just burn you in front of Mansex, that would be fun…

Dear Illusion,

I'm off for a mission for a couple of days. Together with my one love, Zexion!  
Maybe I'll find the courage to tell him how I feel…  
I at least hope it will be fun, but I think he's fun to hang around with so that shouldn't be a problem.  
But what if he thinks I'm just an annoying little brat who talks way too much? Maybe he'll make me an illusion that looks just like him when I'm talking to him and just go off to somewhere else… that wouldn't be fun…

Anyway, I have to hurry, and I don't think I'll have much time to write things down in here, so I'll leave you in the castle.

Demyx out.

Dear diary,

Well Axe tried to walk for the first time again (in stead of stumbling to the toilet with me nearly carrying him there). It wasn't too much fun, he was leaning on me heavily and was in a lot of pain (and that jerk thinks I don't even notice that… idiot). And the kitten decided to be annoying as hell, so that wasn't something to be happy about because the thing was hurting the poor Flurry.

Other than that, I've been walking around in the garden, until Mar chased me with a broom back to the castle (I tried so hard not to laugh, it looked hilarious, Saix stopped walking in front of a window and I actually saw him making some sort of grin like thing that is supposed to be his smile).

Talking about Saix, I really don't see what the HELL Larxene likes in that guy.  
And if he likes her back, I don't see what he likes in her either.  
They're both just horrible to be around, although it's fun to see how annoyed Saix gets when Larxene is trying to convince him to go to the roof and look at the stars or something silly like that… that's really hilarious. Even more because he gets pissed already when he sees her, you can see his fangs get bigger with the second.  
I even think he went to Xemnas to ask if he couldn't just kill the demon-like thing that calls herself a girl. I suppose Xemnas refused, we'd lose a member if he would do that… and I don't know where he'd get a new one from that quickly.

I just feel sorry for Axe, I haven't seen him give a real smile to me for a few days… and I love his real smile… the fake one sounds something like 'haha, this is not funny at all and I'm in too much pain'.

Demyx is off for a mission with Zexion, he was nearly glowing of happiness when he told me. I think they look cute together (although I've never really seen them being together) and I hope for Dem that Zex will be able to make him happy.  
He deserves to be happy.

We all deserve to be happy…

Rox out.


	9. A new mission and depressing thoughts

Dear diary,

Xemnas finally fixed my door so I can sleep in my own room again =).  
He sent Demyx and me out on a mission, but Dem refused and took me out for an afternoon in Twilight Town.  
That was really nice, Riku and Sora were there as well and we had a lot of fun.  
They kept feeding me chocolate until I felt sick, trying to make me feel better.  
It worked, but it made me feel sick after a while.  
It was fun, but I knew Axel wants to see Riku and Sora pretty badly… so I felt kinda sad that he wasn't there with us.  
We bought him a lot of chocolate and some play stuff for the kitten.

When we got back Axel was asleep with the kitten asleep on his belly. How adorable ^_^

I'm off, making some dinner for Axe and me.  
And trying to figure out what a kitten eats…

Baibai

Dear Illusion,

Zexion's back! =) I kinda bumped into him in the hallway on my way out to the garden to play my sitar. He asked me where I was going and so I told him. He asked me if it was okay for him to join me and I said yes (of course I did!!).  
We sat down near the fountain and I started playing. In the beginning I was kinda nervous but he gave me an encouraging smile which made the nerves disappear (and the butterflies in my belly come alive).  
After I played for over an hour or so I noticed him looking at me all the time with a small smile on his face. That felt kinda weird, he had this strange look in his eyes… but it wasn't something bad.  
In the end he even asked me if he could try and play some!  
He's a horrible player, now THAT'S for sure. But he enjoyed the playing and even though the sound is horrible it looked cute.  
The tip of his tongue was out his mouth of concentration, so cute!  
We ended up talking about all kinds of stuff, including missions and our diaries.  
He confessed to me that he writes poems in his diary, that's SO cute! =) I just write down my thoughts and what's going on down here, he writes poems about almost anything.  
I asked him if I could read one sometime and he said yes! *happy*

Dem out to tell Axy and Roxy.

Thing,

With some help of Roxas I tried to walk today.  
It hurt.  
Like bloody hell.  
It wasn't exactly that much fun, but I tried to stay strong and take a few steps, but soon I just plopped down on a chair, with some sort of weird grin (according to Rox).  
I think I'll try again later.

Oh, and the fact that the kitten-thing was clinging to my pants/feet wasn't exactly helping, as it made Rox giggle all the time and it hurt me even more.  
Damn you, you little animal!  
I like the thing, but it can be annoying as well… but everyone's annoying once in a while right?

Demyx has left for a mission for a couple of days, and guess with who? With Zexion. I hope they'll get closer, I'm kinda getting sick of Demyx's nagging about Zexion this, Zexion that etc.

I'm off to sleep for a while,

Axel out.

Maybe I'll just burn you in front of Mansex, that would be fun…

Dear Illusion,

I'm off for a mission for a couple of days. Together with my one love, Zexion!  
Maybe I'll find the courage to tell him how I feel…  
I at least hope it will be fun, but I think he's fun to hang around with so that shouldn't be a problem.  
But what if he thinks I'm just an annoying little brat who talks way too much? Maybe he'll make me an illusion that looks just like him when I'm talking to him and just go off to somewhere else… that wouldn't be fun…

Anyway, I have to hurry, and I don't think I'll have much time to write things down in here, so I'll leave you in the castle.

Demyx out.

Dear diary,

Well Axe tried to walk for the first time again (in stead of stumbling to the toilet with me nearly carrying him there). It wasn't too much fun, he was leaning on me heavily and was in a lot of pain (and that jerk thinks I don't even notice that… idiot). And the kitten decided to be annoying as hell, so that wasn't something to be happy about because the thing was hurting the poor Flurry.

Other than that, I've been walking around in the garden, until Mar chased me with a broom back to the castle (I tried so hard not to laugh, it looked hilarious, Saix stopped walking in front of a window and I actually saw him making some sort of grin like thing that is supposed to be his smile).

Talking about Saix, I really don't see what the HELL Larxene likes in that guy.  
And if he likes her back, I don't see what he likes in her either.  
They're both just horrible to be around, although it's fun to see how annoyed Saix gets when Larxene is trying to convince him to go to the roof and look at the stars or something silly like that… that's really hilarious. Even more because he gets pissed already when he sees her, you can see his fangs get bigger with the second.  
I even think he went to Xemnas to ask if he couldn't just kill the demon-like thing that calls herself a girl. I suppose Xemnas refused, we'd lose a member if he would do that… and I don't know where he'd get a new one from that quickly.

I just feel sorry for Axe, I haven't seen him give a real smile to me for a few days… and I love his real smile… the fake one sounds something like 'haha, this is not funny at all and I'm in too much pain'.

Demyx is off for a mission with Zexion, he was nearly glowing of happiness when he told me. I think they look cute together (although I've never really seen them being together) and I hope for Dem that Zex will be able to make him happy.  
He deserves to be happy.

We all deserve to be happy…

Rox out.


End file.
